The Bottomless Mercy of God

This phrase from this morning's Divine Office struck me.

What better way is there to describe God?

His mercy is bottomless. He loves us. He longs to forgive.

When we tilt our faces even slightly to God, He rushes in. Have you ever noticed this?

Jesus describes God as the father who searches the horizon for his lost son, longing for his return. When the father spots the son, though he is still far away, the father runs to him, arms outstretched, ready for a full embrace*.

In my own life, God rushes in and fills me when I incline my face to Him, even now. I am not worthy of this, yet His love compels Him. Years ago, when my foolishness caused me to stray, He waited for me, searching the horizon for my return. Where would I be if not for this?

I pray that tomorrow, on Divine Mercy Sunday, many will come to know His bottomless mercy, and that we who have received it will pray for those still on the way.

*Check out the story of the Prodigal Son in St. Luke chapter 15.

Hope

Hope. What a beautiful word, like musical sunshine.

Hope is the enticement that leads us forward on the path. It is what, at times, keeps us from plopping down in despair, never to get up.

Hope is Marian Wilson talking, singing, climbing stairs and making progress after her stroke, when at first the doctors said if she survived, she'd be in a vegetative state. Hope is knowing we didn't have to believe that. Hope is knowing our God can do anything when that "anything" is within His will.

We Christians are an Easter people, a people who live with the knowledge that resurrection lies beyond every cross.

After I received the Sacrament of Confirmation a few years back, an astonishing thing happened to me: hope came in the form of music. For months afterward, original words and music popped into my head, as though poured from above, over and over, like this one about Easter:

He came to the earth wrapped in human clothes
To show us the love of the Father, that's the role He chose
And when He died on that cross, it seemed that all was lost
Until on the third day He rose

He's alive! He rose from the grave that Easter morn
He's alive! In every heart that turns to Him and is reborn
He's alive in you, and He's alive in me
Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Blessed Trinity

Mary went to the tomb
Expecting darkness and death and gloom
But what she found there instead
Was our Lord, who wasn't dead
She ran to spread the news

He's alive! He rose from the grave that Easter morn
He's alive! In every heart that turns to Him and is reborn
He's alive in you, and He's alive in me
Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Blessed Trinity

We can know the love of this risen Lord
He knocks, and He's waiting for an open door
He longs to come in, and cleanse our hearts from sin
He lives your soul to win

He's alive! He rose from the grave that Easter morn
He's alive! In every heart that turns to Him and is reborn
He's alive in you, and He's alive in me
Father, Son and Holy Ghost, Blessed Trinity

There is always hope! Can you hear me humming? ;)

The Real Bobinator

Here he is in all his red-headed glory, my other son, Bobby. He drove this tractor around the other day at his grandparents' ranch, and as I watched the back of his red head go down the drive, my heart hitched a bit. Was it that long ago that he sat on his father's knee as they did laps around the same gravel trail on the old red Farmall?! It's hard to believe he's now driving a tractor himself.

When Bobby was 15 months old, he followed his father around the garden, hoe in hand. He was always very serious about work; it was his play. We have photos of Bobby "changing the oil" in his tricycle, while in the background his grandpa worked on his truck.

I think it's this seriousness about his responsibilities that earns him praise from his teachers and the high school administration. That and the fact that he's so willing to help out. He's been called a hero by more than one teacher when he's taken care of a computer problem for them.

Bobby is a senior now and, Lord willing, will soon be off to college. I will miss this future computer engineer. I can hardly express how proud he's made me. I will try to sneak in as many hugs as possible while he's still around.

Here's to you, Bobby, and your bright future! Thanks for blessing our home with the gift of yourself.

Mommyness

I've had an interest in being many things in my life, some of which are listed here:

Psychologist
Marine Biologist
Chemist
Teacher
Politician
Helper to the poor
Pastor's Wife
World Leader (sounds silly I know, but as a child, I really admired Golda Meir)

But at bottom, deep inside, what I really wanted was to have a home filled with love, children and a husband who was my best friend. I stuffed that achy desire deep down in a well somewhere in my soul. I wasn't sure if it was OK to want that. (Mostly I wasn't sure if it was OK for ME to want that.) I chased years of false dreams before I gave in to what I really wanted.

The other night at Mass, the priest gave a blessing to pregnant women. He asked all the mothers in the church to stand and join him in blessing them. It came to me as I stood: I am exactly who I want to be, a mom with no regrets. How did I get so lucky?

I was looking for a picture of me in the throes of Mommyness (an "action shot" :), but, alas, we had no digital camera when the children were young. I chose this picture of my husband and me and I think it's appropriate. After all, without Russ' Daddyness, there would certainly be no Mommyness for me. And it was taken on a Mother's Day.

Oh, how grateful I am for this adventure!

Triduum

I love being Catholic!

Tonight's Mass of the Lord's Supper marks the beginning of the most holy time in the liturgical year, the Easter Triduum.

Five years ago I participated in my first Easter Triduum - Holy Thursday, Good Friday, and finally, the Easter Vigil Mass where I received my first Holy Eucharist and entered into full communion with the Catholic Church.

At the Mass of the Lord's Supper, Jesus' institution of the Eucharist (in other words, the first Mass) is celebrated. Traditionally, this Mass includes a foot washing ceremony, which is symbolic of Christ's institution of the priesthood. After Mass, the altar is stripped of cloths, and the Blessed Sacrament is taken out of the tabernacle in preparation for Good Friday, the only day when there is no Mass said anywhere in the world.

I can almost smell the incense and sense the presence of Christ now; I am thinking of His passing me as He was taken to the Blessed Sacrament Chapel from the tabernacle this evening.

There is an unbroken line of connection that exists between the Church today and Christ in the upper room that is amazing; but when we consider that the unbroken line goes back to the time of the Jews, it compounds the amazement. This evening's first reading was that of the Jews' Exodus from Egypt; our Paschal Feast is a continuance of their Passover.

The Easter Triduum is a heady experience for me. I now head straight to the events of Good Friday tomorrow, and then on Saturday I will share in the joy of Easter Vigil, when fifteen people from our parish will become part of the unbroken line of Christendom.

Oh, how I love being Catholic!

Riddle Me This

Here is the question of the day.

Which is the more loving thing to do, I wonder?

To speak the truth in love (that last part can be difficult), knowing that it may not be received well...

Or to remain silent in the face of unkindness?

I know there are lessons for me to learn...

I'm just not sure which ones!

Opinions are welcome...

A blessed Holy Thursday to you!

Pray for Marian Wilson

In an instant, without warning, in a flash, Marian Wilson was struck down by a stroke. She lies helpless in a hospital bed now and desperately needs our prayers. Little did she know when she woke that her day would turn out this way.

Baking for the parish bake sale must have seemed a benign activity; but one minute she was reaching into her cupboard for ingredients, the next she was unconscious and helpless.

Do any of us know when our lives might be forever changed? No. But how many of us live as though they might?

Luke 12:40: "You must also be ready, for the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect Him."

The Son of Man can come for us in many ways, whether it's illness, an accident or His return. How can we be ready?

Be like Marian, and serve Him fervently. Love those around you. Be faithful in your tasks. Believe. Live your spiritual life devoutly. Teach children about Him. Care for your family.

Matthew 25:10: "But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut."

I have no doubt Marian has oil in her lamp. She is ready to meet her Maker, if that is God's will.

Her condition is serious, but the prognosis is more hopeful than expected. That's the power of prayer. The people of our parish are storming Heaven unceasingly, saying Rosaries for her, devoting chaplets to her healing, pouring our hearts out in prayer throughout the day and into the night. We love Marian, and we want her back with us, whole and healed. God's will be done...

But we pray that His will includes a miracle or two.

Please...

Pray for Marian Wilson.